LOVE ON THE ROAD

THIS WEEK ZOË FINDS A PICTURE OF A STRANGE GIRL IN TRAIN MAN'S WALLET

I'm so over my capsule wardrobe. Everything in it now looks shapeless and my frizzy hair is making me look like Captain Caveman.

Yesterday was Train Man's birthday and I wanted to look as fabulous as I did when I first started stalking him on the 8:21 – but it just wasn't happening.

I'd snapped out of being in a mood with him over the yoghurt. I had to – it was his birthday, and he made it easy for me.

It happened when we arrived in Vietnam and Train Man was taking photos on the streets of Saigon. He did that thing that always makes me weak: he stuck his tongue out of the corner of his mouth, like a little boy concentrating, and I couldn't help but hug him. I'd been in a mood for three days, but being a Good Man, Train Man didn't punish me for my pettiness – or care that I'd ruined his shot.

After he'd arranged the houseboat in India on our anniversary I had to sort something special for his 33rd, so I booked us into the romantic Majestic hotel and reserved a table at Mandarin, Saigon's chicest eaterie.

I changed my outfit seven times before going out, which constituted pretty much everything in my backpack, and I piled on so much make-up, I made Nancy Dell'Olio look understated. I wanted to focus on Train Man's big day but you know what it's like when you feel rubbish: you fidget about until the mojitos kick in. And I couldn't let him know what was bothering me – that would not be cool.

I was $5 short when it came to paying, so Train Man slid his wallet across the table. As I opened it up, I saw a photo of a girl inside. "What's this?" I asked in shock, looking at the bare-faced girl with crazy curls and freckles scattered across her shiny face. "My favourite picture of you," he said coyly.

Now that is a Good Man.

Miles travelled: 158

Terse sentences exchanged: 0

Bad-hair rating: High

Next week: Zoë tries to hide a wobbly bottom lip