Angela Griffin

Have you moved house and regretted it? Would you tell your partner if you were unhappy with moving? Would you consider moving abroad? Would you be willing to sacrifice living somewhere you didn’t like for the sake of your partner?

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Comments

[Lilly]

I've moved, let's count....
ooo heck, it's ten times in the last twelve years, and not in the same country either.

So long as your the sort of person that doesn't need the family around them, or can't bare to leave their home town - you'll enjoy the experience. If you discover the homesickness - tell yourself you'll give yourself a year - and then decide, because it really does take THAT long to get use to living in a new town or country.

I think we've become expert movers and house buyers through all our moving, and have been pondering whether or not we should write a book or a column together, about things to avoid and things to plan - when moving - I think we have learn so much and recovered from so many mistakes. Heck, we could probably do our own tv show about moving haha

Our kids love it too - they are always popular in their new schools because of accents and experiences they can share...plus with all the moving, they've become experts in making new friends, and keeping old ones - our mail is mostly theirs!!!!

I do believe you need to be an open minded person to be able to move towns, countries etc... or you won't last long before your moaning about what the town is like and what the people are like - but mostly about what you miss about your home town.

Home is where you hang your hat - any place can be made a home, where ever you are. I truly believe that to be the case for our family, but it may not be the case for yours...we are all different and want or expect different things out of life. I know so many people that were talking about leaving the Uk, they watched all the living abroad type shows and went on about it all the time - but we were the ones that actually did it - and it's not like we sat and planned and talked about it for years first...talking is all well and good - but for most people they are just talking and no actual design to move abroad - they'd miss home too much, or are too afraid to make the jump.

[karen goddard]

i moved from a town into a rather small village 8 years ago. we had holidayed here for a month first of all, fell in love with the village and moved via house exchange 6 weeks after. i thought it would be a better environment for my children, and also good for my husband and i, as we had not really been getting on. it was the biggest mistake of my life i have ever made. local people looked on us as outsiders, the elder 2 children found it hard to settle and make friends... the youngest seems ok but really its all she has ever known. my husband became depressed and turned to drink, our marriage failed and left me and the children alone here with no friends for support as i couldnt make any. everyone seems to be either related or they have all grown up together, you fall out with one you fall out with them all. obviously my elder 2 girls being teens when we moved here, had boyfriends... when they ended the relationships the parents of these boys were up in arms because it seems everyone marries their first loves, settles down and starts a family instantly... so i made enemies just by my daughters growing up. my eldest is at uni and instead of people being proud of the achievement of this, all they think is "how can she a single parent, send her daughter to uni" or "why isnt she settled down now with a child"... i get the attitude of "who do you think you are". i have made 2 good friends, without them i would go mad i think. but i miss my town friends, my family, the night life, and im not only quite sad here, im also bored rigid. im on the housing list again trying to get back to my home town, but its a long process and as im classed as adequatley housed already i just keep getting pushed back down the list. im even thinking about privately renting, but then ive lost the security of having my own home which is not good for my youngest who still lives at home. the elder 2 girls now have homes of their own, so by rights it would be logical to give me a 2 bedroomed house back where i come from, and allow someone who does need a 3 bedroomed house to have this one... but the housing associations dont seem to think this logical. as my youngest daughters schooling progresses in another 12 months or so i will be in a position where if i do move i will disrupt her education during the most crucial time of preparing for exams, so i may have no choice but to stay on for another 4/5 years.... i feel like im trapped here and its getting so depressing. this move was something i should never have made.

[tracey mcguire]

Our family made the decision 13 months ago to move abroad to tenerife and start a new life and a new career change and it will be a nightmare that we will never forget and still are recovering from as the emotional stress as been overwhelming.We sold our house in scotland and swapped the rain for the sun ,we had been on holiday their with our 2 boys for several years and we knew the island well and we done our homework for the legal side for buying property so we were confident we had all or bases covered so we thought!. we bought an old chemist in a commercial centre which we would go onto change into a family bar.the commercial centre was occupied by british people and other nationalities but mostly british .Through the time we arrived and started to renovate the building there were no signs that people in this community were upset or put out that there was another bussiness going to open.But that all changed when we opened the doors for the first time we had neighbours saying we were illegal and we had no permission to open the bar and they also had not given their permission to the council ,we had threats, they would spit on our windows everynight we shut,urinate on our doors, disgusting slander on the internet about us on all the holiday truth sites, they called the police for no reason and would watch them arrive ,complain to local council and request them to close us. It was horrific something that we hadn,t imagine would happen , All i can say it,s just not the sevices and the area you have to do your homewok on it,s the people in the community as well we only opened for 5 months and we closed the doors and come back home to scotland as the whole situation was out of control and not safe .we lost everything every penny and also destroyed a part of our faith in people even the ending to the experiance was something that we could not vision but that is just as upsetting as the beginning so I will leave it there and keep the ending for another time. thanks

[Gill Ingle]

I read your article on Angela Griffin regretting committing 'countryside' - boy, did it ring true for me too. We had always lived around London and nearly 2 years ago, after my husband's family had moved down to the south coast and after we'd had numerous holidays there staying in a caravan (which we thoroughly enjoyed), we decided we wanted a better life for our two girls, aged 4 and 6. We sold the flat I had bought 13 years earlier when I was single and bought a lovely house, which was so spacious compared to my flat! As soon as we moved there, my husband's family became very distant (my sister-in-law only lived in the next street, my mother-in-law half a mile away). In fact, my mother-in-law only visited our home twice in 9 months and the only times she saw her grandchildren was when I took them to see her. Also, the 'locals' didn't seem to like 'Londoners', even though most of the people living there originated from London! So, after 9 months, during which time I made only 1 friend (not that I didn't try), my husband's family barely spoke to us, we felt very lonely and put our house on the market and moved back to London. Financially, we lost out as the housing market in London had shot up, whereas the market where we were hadn't changed at all. In foresight, we regret making the move, but you learn from your mistakes. We've now got a new home and at least don't feel like outsiders. My advise would be that just because you like somewhere when you go there on holiday, it's very different actually living there.

[alex]

I moved to headingley but it's not cricket, the council gave me a place and it's not living.
It's like this i moved here becouse it seemed very
quiet, peaceful and as i had lived in a one up one down at the side of a main road for a very long time
i signed up for the place without really thinking,
which i do find hard at the best of times after being in a comer and having a craniumotomy.The immoral being's have smashed the window, written graffiti stolen my classic motorbike which i was doing up for more than five year's and they kicked the gate in, which add's to the rent increase. I don't like to leave the place now that i worry about nasty burgler's so i wait for the rain as it washes the scum off the street's and the scum i hope don't see me leave.
The house is pre fabricated built post world war two, door's are insecure there's a large gap in one too, the front window's not solid it let's through a cold draft, so the heating has to be on high which adds to the co2 emmision's helping to heat up our earth and it's costly.
So i know what the lady's saying and i wish i could buy her house, but unfortunatly being poor as a church mouse.

[Caroline Chant]

We have lived in the country in Dorset for many years, and you do not have to live miles away from the nearest M & S or any pubs or other facilities that you are used to living in London.
We have got everything we need near to us, so I do not agree that you need to live in London to eat and to do all the normal things in life to enjoy it.